It's my last day in Ladakh, and I'm not ready to go back to Mumbai. In the past two years, I've roamed a lot. Every place has started to feel a little bit like home, but I don't know if any of them truly are.
Home is such an interesting concept. Some say that it is not the place but the people that make “home” while some say it is the memories. It is so difficult to actually understand what makes a place home. What is a home to a person who keeps to themselves because people can be overwhelming? What is a home to a person who is always surrounded by people but feels like no one really wants to be there? What is a home to a person who has been running away all their life so all their memories are filled with a little fear? What is a home to someone that has never quite felt in place even if all their memories could be straight out of a movie?
If I had every person I love in one little house, would that be home?
Every place that I have stayed at has taken a little bit of my mind. My thoughts have been consumed by them and some part of me will always be affected by them. I might never see them again but there will be a longing to remain there forever.
What is a home for a person who has found love everywhere?
The homestay that I called my home for more than a month, will have a part of there always. Even if only through memories. Maybe it is how I am a boarding school child that I never know how to completely leave a place. Every last day has to be grand because no place remains the same. It has to be engraved in my head as the most perfect home and I will go above and beyond to make that possible.
Every day is a story that is the most joyful, devastating, funny and infuriating ever. My ladakh trip has not been perfect and maybe that’s for the best. My need to never be bored finally backfired and that is a lesson that I really should have learnt long ago. I am grateful that it happened even if it totally wrecked me. Maybe that is a home. A place that even with its comfort, teaches you the most hardest lessons.
Read this 3 days ago and teared up, finally pulled myself together to comment - I love this:)